better

This is one of my favorite action movies. Even after watching it several times, I still notice new brilliant details. Watching without subtitles allows me to focus on every line the actors say, and the dialogue is full of witty wordplay. Even the names of the characters are funny.

Beyond its well-crafted script, the movie explores some deeper themes. It poses the question: for “the greater good,” is it acceptable to make someone disappear? In fact, Inspector Butterman embodies a form of fascism, assuming the power to arrest, judge, and execute anyone at will.

I love this movie, partly because I admire the great chemistry between the two main characters. Furthermore, I’m drawn to the idea of living and working in a small, beautiful village like Sandford. By the end, Angel finally has time to take care of his Japanese peace lily. He learns to switch off and find a balance in his life.

origin

This is my favorite action movie. After saw it several times, I still can notice some lighting parts. Without subtitles, I can focus on every sentence the actor said. There are many smart words. Even the name of characters are funny.

Despite the well organized script, there is more deep thought in this movie. For greater good, is it ok to make someone disappear? Actually, the old Butterman is exactly fascism, who can arrest, judge and execute anyone.

I like this movie. Because I admire the good relationship the two roles have. And further more, I also want to live and work in a small and beautiful village. In the end, Angel has time to take care of his graden. He finally can switch off, and find his own life.

analysis

这是对 origin 部分的逐句批改和分析：

  1. 原文: This is my favorite action movie.

    • 问题: 如果有很多喜欢的电影，用 one of my favorite... 更准确。
    • 修改后: This is one of my favorite action movies.

  2. 原文: After saw it several times, I still can notice some lighting parts.

    • 问题: After saw 语法错误，应为 After seeing。lighting parts 表达不清晰，意为“亮点”时可用 brilliant details。
    • 修改后: Even after watching it several times, I still notice new brilliant details.

  3. 原文: Without subtitles, I can focus on every sentence the actor said.

    • 问题: the actor 是单数，用复数 actors 更合适。时态用现在时 say 更好。
    • 修改后: Watching without subtitles allows me to focus on every line the actors say.

  4. 原文: There are many smart words.

    • 问题: smart words 表达口语化，可用 witty wordplay (巧妙的文字游戏) 代替。
    • 修改后: The dialogue is full of witty wordplay.

  5. 原文: Even the name of characters are funny.

    • 问题: 主语 name 是单数，谓语动词应为 is。或者将 name 改为复数 names。
    • 修改后: Even the names of the characters are funny.

  6. 原文: Despite the well organized script, there is more deep thought in this movie.

    • 问题: Despite (尽管) 用词不当，暗示了剧本和思想的矛盾。用 Beyond 或 In addition to (除了…之外) 更合适。more deep thought 可优化为 deeper themes。
    • 修改后: Beyond its well-crafted script, the movie explores some deeper themes.

  7. 原文: For greater good, is it ok to make someone disappear?

    • 问题: 惯用语是 For the greater good。
    • 修改后: It poses the question: for "the greater good," is it acceptable to make someone disappear?

  8. 原文: Actually, the old Butterman is exactly fascism, who can arrest, judge and execute anyone.

    • 问题: 将一个人比作一个主义 (fascism) 不恰当。可以说他体现了法西斯主义。
    • 修改后: In fact, Inspector Butterman embodies a form of fascism, assuming the power to arrest, judge, and execute anyone at will.

  9. 原文: I like this movie. Because I admire the good relationship the two roles have.

    • 问题: Because 不应独立引导句子。roles (角色) 不如 characters (人物) 准确。
    • 修改后: I love this movie, partly because I admire the great chemistry between the two main characters.

  10. 原文: And further more, I also want to live and work in a small and beautiful village.

    • 问题: further more 应写成一个词 Furthermore。
    • 修改后: Furthermore, I'm drawn to the idea of living and working in a small, beautiful village like Sandford.

  11. 原文: In the end, Angel has time to take care of his graden.

    • 问题: graden 拼写错误，应为 garden。可以更具体地指出是电影里的日本和平百合 (Japanese peace lily)。
    • 修改后: By the end, Angel finally has time to take care of his Japanese peace lily.

  12. 原文: He finally can switch off, and find his own life.

    • 问题: find his own life 表达较宽泛，可以优化为“找到生活的平衡”。
    • 修改后: He learns to switch off and find a balance in his life.